Handling Last Minute Resistance

last minute resistanceWe discussed some reasons and the psychology on why she is not ready for sex. You’re with this girl and everything is going great. You already got her in your place and even in your bed and you’re thinking it’s a sure thing yet she starts giving excuses why she doesn’t or can’t have sex. How do you overcome this?

You need more comfort.

Is it that simple? In the grand scheme of things, yes. However, it involves some calibration and gaming to hone this down. You need to build a deeper connection with her and share more information about each other. You can either elicit more investment from her by asking her deeper qualifying questions about herself or tell her deep comfort stories about yourself.

What are some ways to elicit more investment from her? Get her to talk about her family, her passions / dreams, her journey in life. Ask why she made the decisions that she did and how did it make her feel? If she tells you something really personal about herself like her abusive father or boyfriend and how she dealt with it (or didn’t), then reward her investment reciprocally with escalation like a hug and kiss to her forehead or even her lips. Depending on how recent she gave some resistance, you can try to go for the full close again. If she keeps giving you resistance, pull back again and get more investment from her and / or talk about yourself.

She wants to feel more comfortable with you and trust you. You already have attraction now and have enough compliance for her to be in your bedroom, now you just have to be non-reactive if she gives you resistance and just build more comfort. If you haven’t told her anything really personal yet about yourself, then now would be a good time to tell her.

Tell her about how when you got you first got your puppy, you were so happy as a kid and had so much fun playing with your dog as he grew up, but were devastated when he ran away or died later. Tell her how you lost your virginity with your first girlfriend and how it was so special between the two of you. Of course you should use stories out of your own life and not use canned routines from other people’s lives.

Ultimately, it all comes down to investment and comfort if you want to overcome LMR or not have any of it to begin with. If you have enough investment and comfort from the girl before you bring her into your house, your chances of running into LMR are much lower. Some girls will have different comfort levels for sex so you will have to calibrate. Get her emotionally invested in the interaction and transition smoothly throughout the interaction and solve logistics and you will be set.

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One Reply to “Handling Last Minute Resistance”

  1. Pingback: She’s Not Ready for Sex | Will Edward

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